I Walk Through The Desert, Past A Lizard And A Rattlesnake / I Tip The Bottle And Bite The Lime

Action!Horror! Suspense! Mutants! C.J. sitting all alone on a park bench, weeping and mourning the brutal shooting of Secret Service agent Simon Donovan! Okay, so the last one's a bit of a downer. But still, you should read The Pajiba trade round-up, where all the week's news comes handily condensed, not to mention with expletives and pretty pictures. Read it.

I'm officially going to have to wait something like 6 months to post my own thoughts about Dane Cook, since the TV Whore has once again knocked out a great column, this one about the hype behind the SuFi.

In response to all the e-mails I get on the subject, and in the interest of public safety, here are some facts about midgets that might come in handy.

What's that you say? You're thirsty for some bedroom poptronica? Well, eat up. I recommend the frighteningly catchy cover of "King of Wishful Thinking." You will not be disappointed. You simply will not.

I've been listening to "Fizzy Fuzzy …" for at least 8 years now, and it's still pretty amazing. The tracks mix humor and heartbreak and the heat from the Sonoran Desert, blended through a return to honest, post-grunge '90s rock with a Southwestern flavor. "Blue Collar Suicide" opens up with a high-powered punchline, but "Down Together" is timeless, and "Girly" has a punk-injected swing reminiscent of classic Uncle Tupelo tracks. I could go on, but I won't, except to say that by the time Roger Clyne belts out the final chorus in "Nada" — "There ain't no morals to these stories at all / And everything I tell you you can bet will be a lie" — the album has somehow offered a look at something deeper, more substantial, than just barreling through the desert with the top down. Sometimes that's the best way to get there.