With A Devilish Look In Her Eye

Oh please no. No. Please, oh just and loving Creator, not like this. Not like this. Please no. This isn't Dan and Casey rallying; this is Jubal Early floating through space, lost, alone, unresolved. This is coldness. This is ambiguity. This is heartache. I will miss this show like no other, and it will always hurt like hell that things never got resolved. Do you hear me? It will never get any easier. I don't even know what to say. I've got a piece over at Pajiba that begins to work through my grief. All I can do is read back over some of my favorite exchanges from the past three years (and there are many, many more), and smile: Keith: I never want you to think that your mom is the villain in all of this. Veronica: Isn't she? Keith: No, it's not that simple.... Veronica: Yeah, it is. The hero is the one that stays ... and the villain is the one that splits. Keith: Who's your Daddy? Veronica: I hate it when you say that. Keith: This is important, you remember this, I used to be cool. Veronica: When? Keith: '77. Trans-Am, Blue Oyster Cult in the 8-track; foxy, stacked blond riding shotgun; racing for pink slips. Wait a minute, I'm thinking of a Springsteen song. Scratch everything. I was never cool. Veronica: I don't know which bothers me more, "foxy" or "stacked." Veronica: It's all fun and games till one of you gets my foot up your ass. Keith: So how was your date? Veronica: Oh, you know. Lousy conversation, but the sex was fantastic! Keith: That's not funny. Veronica: I don't know. I'm pretty sure it was. Veronica: [voiceover] Tragedy blows through your life like a tornado, uprooting everything. Creating chaos. You wait for the dust to settle and then you choose. You can live in the wreckage and pretend it's still the mansion you remember. Or you can crawl from the rubble and slowly rebuild. Veronica: Got any enemies you know about? Wallace: Well, there's the Klan. Veronica: [voiceover] J. Geils was right. Love stinks. You can dress it up in sequins and shoulder pads, but one way or another, you're just gonna end up alone at the spring dance strapped in uncomfortable underwear. Veronica: [voiceover] So this is how it is. The innocent suffer, the guilty go free, and truth and fiction are pretty much interchangeable. ...There is neither a Santa Claus, nor an Easter Bunny, and there no angels watching over us. Things just happen for no reason, and nothing makes any sense. Veronica: Mrs. C. I trust you're well. Kendall: Oh, well, if it isn't Little Miss Teen Getaway. Your dad and I were just dealing with a little trouble. Veronica: Like, trouble with a capital "T," that rhymes with "C," that stands for — Keith: Veronica! Veronica: I was gonna say "cute." Logan: As a rule, I like to start every school day with a hot blond waiting for me in the parking lot. Veronica: Me too. Logan: I'm not blond. Veronica: Or hot. Got a question for you: remember back when you were doing the deed with Dick's stepmom? Logan: Mmm, vaguely. I remember she thought I was hot. Veronica: Were you with her on the day of the crash? You two talked on the phone a few times that day. Logan: Man, you're obsessed with my sex life. Do I need to start carrying around a webcam from now on? Veronica: Logan... Logan: Day of the crash, day of the crash... uh, I'd really have to consult my feelings journal to be sure. Veronica: Kendall stood to make millions by sending Dick and Beaver over that cliff. There was an insurance policy. Logan: Kendall requires a domestic staff to make cereal. You really think she could plot a murder? Veronica: Were you with her at 7:03? Logan: Actually, she kicked me out before the sheets were dry. But considering her husband's fondness for handguns, and the fact that Dick and Beaver could come home at any moment, who could blame her? Anything else? Oh, I, uh, I got to second base with Tammy Forester in 8th grade in Duncan's closet. Last summer, I made this townie girl moan without even using my hands. Is any of this relevant? Should I make a list? Veronica: You're patronizing me? Keith: To be fair, I am your patron. And, to cap it off, one of the series' classic scenes. It would be impossible to pick a favorite moment (Veronica's tearful paternity scene in Season 1 is gut-wrenching), but this one comes awful close: