Plus It's Really Hot, And There Are Bugs: An Online Transcript

Sis: i was telling co-workers about our pancake dinerthey think it's cool and that we should open it here but i said the chances of getting you to come back to abilene are slim me: tell them the chances of me moving to abilene are slim to none, and none just punched slim in the nuts me: if i won the lottery and my wife heidi klum wanted to move to abilene just so we could have sex beneath the tower of light during watermelons at GSP pledging — i would probably not go Sis: hahahahaha holy crap so that's settled then it'll be in cali or austin me: austin works just not abilene Sis: right me: if my wife kristen bell wanted to move to abilene so she could wear a sandwich-board everyday that said "i will bear all of dan carlson's children, for his love is my sustenance and his body my joy," and if i was given a job as president of acu and allowed to turn the admin building into a house/fort/waterslide — i would probably not go